Wednesday, December 07, 2005

shitbumdarnitandbugger

It didn't work.

Well, it did, really well, in that the baby's butt popped out of my pelvis like a cork out of a champagne bottle, but instead of its head rolling forward as it should after such a manouvre, it jammed even higher up into my liver. We tried twice, but after the baby's heartbeat went up the second time, the assumption is now that the cord is holding weebee where it is, which feels like somewhere in my right lung.

I still haven't been scheduled for surgery, because Chris and I are perpetually hopeful. I see him again on Monday to reassess and regroup, and if I'm still breech, I guess we'll talk c-section then. He's as keen as I am to deliver vaginally (ooh! I said 'vaginally' on the internet!)(and, err, no, not using his vagina...)(and lookit me! I said 'vaginally' and raised it a 'vagina'! I'm so risque!) so I'm going to ask him his opinion on back flipping the baby. I forgot to ask him yesterday about that as I was a little distracted, what with my innards reasserting themselves after having been squooshed to one side to flip the weebs. Oh, and then I thought I might be in labour as my braxton hicks came thick and fast for the rest of the day, and my back? Oh, how she hurt (and for anyone who pishes at things like Kinesiology: pthhhh <- that's for you because I shit you not, within minutes of seeing my Kinesiologist (an appointment I just happened to have made fucking weeks ago, grazie dio) the cramping and back pain stopped, just like that. *snaps fingers* Hell, even I was impressed with how well it worked)

I'm really disappointed as I had a good feeling about yesterday on Monday (huh?), and like an idiot, I still believe this baby could turn. Of course, in the meantime and for Every. Waking. Minute (and even while I sleep, if the waking up at dawn thing is any indication of my messed up mind state) I'm scared that the baby has created a little noose for itself.




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